The dreaded nits

Yes, we had a houseful of them. Naomi was scratching a lot, and on closer inspection had quite the infestation. Then it turns out we all did! Or at least we all felt itchy enough from the very thought of it! Naturally, of course, this came one week before our lovely summer holiday, so we all got a treatment of the special shampoo (even me - having just returned from Prague, which I'm sure would have counted as quarantine...) Yet, weeks later, the darn things keep making a comeback! It's enough to cause nightmares - what's that screaming? Aaaaargggh!

(emphasis may have been added for dramatic effect - in fact these later covert photos suggest that there was even some enjoyment of the whole affair. Stranger and stranger it gets.)

Moo!

Having settled in to the new house, I've been on another couple of trips.

First was another Crest Open Workshop - the COW - but this time quite exciting, in that I'd been invited to give a talk on my work. Specifically on some work I've done with the airline KLM to improve some of their software. You can see a video of it (about 25 minutes) here if you like. Another trip to London, but I didn't get to visit Heather this time as speakers are expected to stick around a actually "speak" with people!

I was also in Sheffield for two days at a workshop run by EPSRC - one of the UK Government's research councils - to learn about research funding. Besides the workshop (which was very good!) there were two other highlights for me. First, the James Bond style that my room key was presented in...

Second, I took a quick walk through the arches under the former Great Central Railway (Sheffield Victoria Station) that I'd spotted on my last visit. This is the Cobweb Bridge, can you see why? :)

The former station hotel

One more thing - it was Valentine's day not so long ago. Jay and I did get out on a proper date - meal and cinema thanks to my parents visiting!

Yum!

Two other things worth sharing from the day. Naomi made me this card, which I thought brilliant...

I also saw these at work. I love working in a university :)

Maths humour is fun!

Rain

The other day it was raining...

While we were eating breakfast, Miriam came out with one of the funniest lines I've ever heard from a child. She looked out of the window and said:

"I don't like rain. I like firefighters."

Well, what's not to like? The best part - she said it again the following day!

"Mummy, why are you laughing?"

Antics

Okay, so work-specific humour is rarely actually funny... anyway, you might recall that I appreciated some civil-engineer comedy back in Loughborough. Well, now I'm in a computing department and can appreciate that sort of thing on a whole new level.

Currently the stairwell near my office is having some repairs. There was a hole in the plaster and it got patched up. Of course, it's taking a little while to be painted, so our CS buddies have had a bit of fun...

Tee hee!

As a consequence of recent work, three coathooks and a screw have been sitting on the window sill of our common room for the past few weeks. Several people have anonymously been rearranging them into various sculptures, some of which have been most impressive...

I like the similarity with the Wallace Monument of this one!

Well, the "p" in phd could easily be for procrastination after all :)

Finally, once again I had a beautiful view cycling back tonight. For some reason the sunsets in Stirling are particularly stunning. The camera phone doesn't really do it justice, but here's the view just outside the university car park...

Jokes

Naomi is learning about jokes. This is a true conversation from last night's dinner time. I'm particularly satisfied that it appears immediately after my post on the COW.

Naomi: "Why did the cow cross the road?"

Mummy: "I don't know"

Naomi: "To go to the shops to buy milk."

Daddy: "You know, even funnier would be to say that 'she was moooving house'"

Naomi looks a little puzzled and then laughs appropriately.

Mummy: "You see, that's funny because cows go moo"

Naomi: "Why did the pig cross the road?"

Mummy: "Why?"

Naomi: "She was moooving house'!"

Mummy and Daddy: hysterics.

Misc

Time for a little catch up again...

We open with a caption competition. What could possibly be up there?

I really like this picture, which you can probably guess immediately followed the one above. I was after a new background for my phone, and this made the cut.

Soon after, Naomi went on a picture taking exercise again...

"No pictures"

"Well, okay then"

"Look over there, a squirrel! Really!"

Some time after those pictures, we got a similar look of amazement from the girls during dinner. I turned around to see a hot air balloon - and quite an impressive one coming surprisingly close to the house.

It landed in a field a few minutes' walk away.

Breakfast. I like the improvised seats.

Every night now bedtime partly consists of the girls taking a few minutes to read themselves. We find this scene cute every time.

...and now some non-child randomness...

This plant live in our bathroom. I moved it there this time last year to get more sunlight than it was getting in our en-suite, because it looked like it was struggling. Soon after, it seemed to have died completely. I watered the bare earth in the pot for a while in case it came back, but probably stopped doing so around January. As a testament to our cleaning-motivation, the empty pot has sat there ever since, bone dry. Imagine our surprise then, when the plant sprung back to life in July, and has now grown to this! I've started watering it again, albeit very sparingly given that it seems to be happy without it. The lesson - don't tidy up dead plants!

To close - a nice Venn diagram that some may find amusing. If you can think of a good joke to fit in the middle I'd like to hear it!

Top ten ways to know you have a toddler in the house...

1. If you are unable to find anything you look in the toddler's toy box and the fridge just to rule them out, but more often than you should you find the thing you were looking for
2. Nothing (of any importance) is kept below a height of 2.5 feet.
3. You wash the soap before you use it.
4. Running out of bananas or raisins is considered an emergency where remedial action is require immediately!
5. It is hard to find a plate or bowl in your kitchen unless you want to eat off something plastic.
6. Your favourite DVD boxset is impossible to find as it is buried beneath a large pile of Peppa Pig DVDs.
7. You need to check there is toilet paper before you sit down on the toilet as a helpful wee soul may have moved it all for you when you weren't looking.
8. Knowing you need to make a 'phone call during business hours sends a shiver down your spine as you have a sense of dread with regards to the destruction that can be done during even a two minute call.
9. In order to make a meal you must first hunt down your saucepan which was stolen earlier in the day for a game of make-believe kitchens.
10. Wherever you look there is a sea of half eaten bits of fruit that were requested then discarded within moments of each other.

A Cautionary Tale About Co-sleeping

After a hideous night with the children a few nights ago while Sandy was away, I share with you my cautionary tale about co-sleeping which should be sung (approximately) to the tune of "there were ten in the bed".  But before I do, here is a photo that was taken at bath-time just before the night in question

There were three in their beds and the biggest one said,

"all sleep there, all sleep there."

So they all slept a while but the little one said,

"I want milk, I want milk"

So Mummy rolled over and gave some milk but the little one said,

"I'll stay here, I'll stay here"

There were two in the bed but the bigger one said,

"I want in, I want in"

So Mummy let the bigger one in, but she wriggled and she jiggled so the little one said,

"I want milk, I want milk"

So mummy rolled over and gave some milk and the bigger one said,

"HELLO" at the top of her voice

So the little one said,

"Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah"

So the bigger one said,

"Not here, not here"

So the mummy one took her back to her bed so there were two in the bed and the little one said,

"I want milk, I want milk"

There were two in the bed when the bigger one said,

"I want back, I want back"

So the Mummy one got her and tucked her in and begged her to close her eyes for there were three in the bed when the little one said,

"I want milk, I want milk"

So we all rolled over and some milk was drunk.

There were three in the bed when we fell asleep just in time for the alarm to say

"Beep beep beep, beep beep beep"

There was no-one in the bed when the Mummy said,

"Give me coffee, give me coffee"

Dear Tooth Fairy...

Dear Tooth Fairy,

I know you normally come into action when teeth start falling out, but I find it necessary to write a letter of complaint and I wouldn't know who else to send it to.

Teeth!

The thing is, Naomi's nappies are just hideous just now and I put this squarely down to the coming in of her four remaining teeth.  I have only limited energy just now as I am also trying to rear a small baby and the extra washing is not appreciated, neither is the extra time spent trying to persuade a wriggly toddler to lie still.

Also, the sleepless nights are not all that ideal either.  They could be worse and I don't know for sure that teeth have any part in the problem but I would quite like them to stop now, like I say, I'm already dealing with a little baby and that takes up quite enough of my night time.

Also, and this is the most important thing.  When I look at Naomi chewing on her hands and trying to make herself feel better I just want to make it all better.  So if you can just arrange for the last few teeth to appear, and soon, so this stage of her life can just be over, that would be much appreciated.

Sincerely,

Naomi's Mummy

P.S.  If you can arrange for Miriam's teeth to come in without any drama that would also be considered a good thing!

Things I thought I'd never do...

"I'll never do that!" "I'll never say that!"

We all have things we thought we would never do or say with or to our children, someone I follow on twitter thought they'd never use alcohol hand gel after a nappy change, they'd always wash their hands properly.  They *thought* that's what they'd do!

So here are some things I'd heard parents do, that I genuinely thought I'd never, ever do (but do)!

1. I do actually put my finger inside my children's noses to remove snot!
2. Let my child have a fourth biscuit in ten minutes because I just don't have the energy to say no any more.
3. Make a cup of tea that I not only don't finish but in fact don't even start.
4. Give my child a biscuit to make it be quiet.
5. Put cbeebies on to babysit my child for a minute or ten.
6. Walk my child around in a buggy for an hour in the vain hope that it will make them fall asleep.
7. Use a dummy
8. Leave the house already covered in sick and aware of this fact without first changing my clothes.
9. Shout at my child (Although I suspected this one might prove too hard, I had this crazy idea I would remain calm and in control and always use appropriate non-shouting discipline)
10. Use my finger, covered in my own saliva, to clean a child's face.

And in related but happier news, I never really thought I'd paint with my child, I thought it would stress me out to much but here is Naomi and I enjoying a happy afternoon painting pictures (Miriam did some footprints too)

You know you're a Mum of two when...

Just for fun I thought I'd think about all the things that mean I know I'm a Mum of two...

1. Going to the toilet is now a spectator sport, you consider it luxury if you only have to take one of the children with you.
2. A hobby is a thing you used to do
3. You can't remember the last time you didn't have the washing machine running
4. Sleep is a distant memory and a beautiful dream (not that you are ever asleep to have dreams)
5. Your house is tidy for approximately two hours each evening, after the children have gone to bed
6. You can (and regularly do) bounce a baby, read to a toddler, speak on the 'phone and drink a cup of tea
7. Going to Tesco is an 'activity', if not there are not enough hours in the day
8. Going to Tesco on your own is almost better than a night out, on the occasions it happens you take time to read every single label whether you need to or not
9. It is a regular occurrence to make it to midday before someone points out your jumper is on back to front
10. On being asked your name or date of birth you look blankly at the person asking as you take a minute to access the memory banks
11. On being asked your child's name or date of birth you take a moment to remember which child is which before giving your answer.
12. You are in town and suddenly panic that you have come with no snacks or drinks when you realise you only have the baby with you and the baby isn't weaned.
13. Your automatic response to any kind of stressful situation is to start singing 'sleeping bunnies' as you know the toddler will automatically lie down, be still and be quiet for 10 seconds!
14. You can't imagine loving your children any more than you do
15. You wouldn't change anything about your life as it's a blessing to have your children each and every day.

Funny

A bit of Friday humour. Well, if you have my sense of humour it is (so, just me then...). For the past few years Jay's been getting me a calendar for my desk at work; it started out with some daily brainteasers and quotes, then moved on to Dilbert (which is just great by the way), but this year I have some New Yorker cartoons. These are a bit hit-or-miss, but today's appealed to me greatly:

I tried looking for some more by the same guy - Ariel Molvig - and there's loads of good stuff. I'm also quite fond of this one:

The next post should be some more Naomi pictures, which of course, if what everyone really wants!

Hmm

So, work's being pretty hectic this week. We have a workshop next week where we spend some time with our industrial partners talking about how the research is going - there's usually a lot of back-and-forth where we talk about example building design problems and what kind of information our software will be able to provide about them. I'll maybe post a couple of example buildings that we've generated some time - they don't mean much to those who aren't building designers or computer scientists of course but they look nice. I'll be giving a presentation on all the different ways we can show the tradeoff between a building's energy, cost, comfort and other things, which should hopefully kick off a good discussion. So I've been doing a fair bit of preparation - and unfortunately plan "sleep" didn't work so well last night and I'm pretty tired :( Hence my afternoon break and retreat into the blog. Hopefully tonight things will be better!

To cheer the soul, here's something I've been meaning to post for ages. I accept that computer scientist humour is pretty bad (one of my first days as a researcher at RGU we all had a good laugh about using a random search algorithm to find somewhere to go for lunch. Hmm.) However, here's a piece of building designer humour, on the wall of the kitchen in the office I work in...

Caption Competition

If you win your prize is being funnier than anyone else!

L

Much to Jay's annoyance everytime I heard the word "labour" I couldn't get this out of my head from about three months ago until the birth. Now I'm sharing it with everyone - it's from the earlier days of Harry Enfield's humorous television programme.

L is for Labour